Sunday, January 16, 2011

Should I Put Another Shrimp on the Barbie?

I stink at goodbyes.
And sudoku, but mostly just goodbyes.
I always end up crying, which leads to smeared make-up, which leads to the embarrassing reminder that I'm crying, which leads to anger, which leads to unexpected lashing out, which leads to court hearings and intense psychotherapy.

BUT. Rs Munos shed some light on the subject,
"It's not goodbye. It's just see you later."

I've been thinking about it, and since this is my blog I and I can do what ever the heck I want, I will now impress you with my knowledge of Austrailian lingo through the witty conversation of an average Austrailian:
***NOTE: For you...Americans... i've  graciously provided a referance list below.***

"Ello, Mate! Did ja geit any Pressies for Chrissie? All I got wus a pair of Bathers and loads of Fairy Floss. It was a Shonky affiar, more or less. You 'ouldn't guess who I saw at Mackers yesterday! You remember Charlie? The Yobbo who used ta Whinge all the time? Well I felt bad, so I told 'im his big mac was My Shout. After saying Ooroo, I left and got myself an Icy Pole. But the stoupid Mozzies kept trying to take a nick at me, so I took the Lift up to my Rellies apartment - you know, Uncle Steve and Aunt Shelia? Well while Aunt Shelia wus busy changing li'l Henry's Nappy, Fredrick walked in and -  the ol' dag - knocked over my Cuppa! So I called him a Nong, and Aunt Shelia was very upset and told me ta leave. All I knows is that I was Happy as Larry to get out of there."

I think it's safe to say that Aussies were the first to come up with abbreves.
I also think it's safe to say that Christmas will from now on be called Chrissie.
And, maybe I'm going out on a limb here, but I think it's extra safe to say Yobbo sounds WAY more appro pro than "redneck".

Common terms and phrases used in every day Austrialia:   
    Bathers           Swim trunks   
    Billabong       Watering hole   
    Bum               The part of you that sits on a chair, your bottom.   
    Chrissie          Christmas   
    Cuppa            Cup of tea or coffee   
    Dag                Amusingly uncoordinated, "he's such a dag"   
    Fairy Floss     Cotton candy   
    Fred Nerk       Someone imaginary, "I suppose Fred Nerk did it?"   
    Good on ya    Good job, good for you   
    Happy as Larry    Very happy   
    Icy pole           Popsicle   
    Jelly                jell-o
    Joe Bloggs      Mr average citizen, John Doe   
    Lollies             Candy   
    Lift                  Elevator   
    Mackers          McDonald's   
    Mate               Friend   
    Mozzie           Mosquito   
    Nappy            Diaper   
    Nong              Idiot, "you nong!"   
    Ooroo            Goodbye   
    Prezzies          Presents   
    Rellies            Relatives   
    My shout        I'll pay this time   
    Shonky          A questionable deal    
    Whinge          Complain all the time   
    Yobbo            Redneck   
    You Right?    May I help you?  Do you need anything?

Along with the hugs and tears, I got a very specific list of what was wanted of me:

    * 1 (one) 8oz bottle of sand.
    * 1 (one) boomerang made out of kowala bears.
    * A plethora (lots) of outback stakehouse coupons.
    * 500 (five-hundie) pictures with "hot aussies of the male species"
    * 1 (one) austrialian man, kangaroo, kowala, dingo.
    * 1 (one) dance on steve erwin's grave.
    * 3 (three) shrimps on the barbie.

And so my dear friends, I'm off. But do not fret- T'will not be long before I'm back ruling Timpview with an iron first and my sidekick mariachi band.
Just know that I expect FB messages every 5 minutes on the MINUTE.
I'll miss every darn one of you. I love alls y'alls.
The Two Month Countdown starts.....n-....N-.....No-.....NOW!

Ooroo, America. 'Ello Australia!

 would you look at that???

1 comment:

  1. Abby like you don't tell me you're going to Australia!! That's so exciting, what part are you going too? I'm guessing somewhere on the east coast but if it's by chance Perth than I have to tell you some awesome places/stores/hot australian boy hang-outs that they have there. :)
    But dude have the funnest time! Who are you going with?